Life at home is nice. Comfortable, ie as comfortable as it can get at your in-laws place. Trust me, when your mom-in-law insists you relax while she clears up the kitchen, things get fidgety within you! Especially when there's nothing else to do but go grab an afternoon siesta while the poor lady works away..!
But I survive. There have been a few instances when I've felt I behaved a bit with the mom-in-law as I'd do with my own mum, and then spent hours wondering if I'd been rude..! But she's pretty cool. Different, but cool.
But I survive. There have been a few instances when I've felt I behaved a bit with the mom-in-law as I'd do with my own mum, and then spent hours wondering if I'd been rude..! But she's pretty cool. Different, but cool.
BUT I'm much more comfortable Here, a whole eight hours away. I miss Home, wish I could go back more often, but it's comfortable Here.
So imagine my disappointment when the Hub-man went into what I have learnt to call his 'Stretch' zone the first time we came Here. It had been a grueling twelve hour drive in stormy weather, and we were exhausted. I missed home like crazy, and the Hub-man really did not help when he disappeared into the 'Stretch' zone the day (or the night, to be precise) we landed.
The Stretch zone is defined in the book 'Men are from Mars..' as the instance when the Man feels that he has achieved whatever it is that he had to achieve. He feels he has got his love, and his life is exactly where he wants it. He now needs to find himself, and for this, he stretches away from the Woman, taking time to be with 'Himself'. No, he doesn't go off anywhere, it would be easier if he did! He is right there, just lost away from you, within himself.
Yes, I know, I know! Taking knowledge away from these kinda books is the first road leading to a bad relationship! But it's true! And as I have learnt in the case of the Hub-man, if we've spent a particularly loving day or weekend together, I can expect him to disappear the next day. And he won't even know what he's doing.
Thankfully, the first time he pulled that on me, I was prepared. Upset, but prepared. I had read the book from cover to cover way back in my graduation, and the phrase 'Rubber-band stretching away' jumped at me when he seemed to disappear into thin air right in front of my eyes!
The book said to leave him be. If I clung or lost my cheerfulness, his stretch would lengthen and stretch until he had completely withdrawn from me. Because apparently, he needs that space sometimes. The only thing is that after I've spent an entire day at work agonizing over his 'Stretch', I return home to find a whistling Hub-man acting all normal.
That's enough to drive the sanest of them up the wall, and for bat-crazy people like me, it can really get murderous!!!
So imagine my disappointment when the Hub-man went into what I have learnt to call his 'Stretch' zone the first time we came Here. It had been a grueling twelve hour drive in stormy weather, and we were exhausted. I missed home like crazy, and the Hub-man really did not help when he disappeared into the 'Stretch' zone the day (or the night, to be precise) we landed.
The Stretch zone is defined in the book 'Men are from Mars..' as the instance when the Man feels that he has achieved whatever it is that he had to achieve. He feels he has got his love, and his life is exactly where he wants it. He now needs to find himself, and for this, he stretches away from the Woman, taking time to be with 'Himself'. No, he doesn't go off anywhere, it would be easier if he did! He is right there, just lost away from you, within himself.
Yes, I know, I know! Taking knowledge away from these kinda books is the first road leading to a bad relationship! But it's true! And as I have learnt in the case of the Hub-man, if we've spent a particularly loving day or weekend together, I can expect him to disappear the next day. And he won't even know what he's doing.
Thankfully, the first time he pulled that on me, I was prepared. Upset, but prepared. I had read the book from cover to cover way back in my graduation, and the phrase 'Rubber-band stretching away' jumped at me when he seemed to disappear into thin air right in front of my eyes!
The book said to leave him be. If I clung or lost my cheerfulness, his stretch would lengthen and stretch until he had completely withdrawn from me. Because apparently, he needs that space sometimes. The only thing is that after I've spent an entire day at work agonizing over his 'Stretch', I return home to find a whistling Hub-man acting all normal.
That's enough to drive the sanest of them up the wall, and for bat-crazy people like me, it can really get murderous!!!
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